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[personal profile] godslay 2019-04-24 04:16 am (UTC)(link)
[ She watches that soft kiss, that warm smile. ]

Good night, Peter.

[ She offers him that gentle smile that she’s given Peter so many times before, letting this be no different. However, instead of scooting in to curl against his chest, she pulls up the blankets around her shoulders, her eyes sliding closed.

(It’s superficial, mostly for show; she rarely sleeps well now when she’s beside Ego.) ]
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[personal profile] godslay 2019-04-24 02:12 pm (UTC)(link)
[ Gamora doesn't sleep, exactly, but she rests. She drifts off into something approximating sleep, if only because this entire situation has left her on high alert, constantly.

Which is why her eyes open at the first odd sound out of Peter.

She sits up quickly, alarmed, confused, with no idea what to make of the apparent fit. She's momentarily paralyzed by the idea of what Ego may be doing to Peter's body (if this is some inadvertent side effect, if this is some struggle for control, maybe an explanation for the note he'd left her).

He flails and gasps, and she finally reaches out to him as he tries to shove himself upright. ]


Peter. [ Insistent. ] Peter, Peter.

[ One hand on his shoulder, the other on his arm, she helps brace him, keeps his strength from giving out all over again. ]
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[personal profile] godslay 2019-04-24 06:11 pm (UTC)(link)
[ Gamora's eyes are wide as he stumbles through his words, and god, he sounds like he's in so much pain, and she can't— What can she even do about it?

But now it all makes sense, those missing pieces of the puzzle, the explanation, but Peter is still in there. Part of her had been so afraid that he was gone for good, that there was nothing of him left, even with the small notes. But he's here, and she knows that it's him, not Ego wearing his face; the ache in her chest is all that much sharper as she holds onto him, keeps him steady. ]


Peter.

[ She cuts him off as he starts to hyperventilate, and she reaches up to ease his fingers out of his hair, to gentle that white-knuckled grip. ]

I knew it wasn't you. I knew something was wrong.

[ She didn't know how, and she only slightly had an idea of what, but—

She knew it wasn't Peter. ]


How do we—

[ She closes her eyes, squeezing his hand. ]

What can I do?
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[personal profile] godslay 2019-04-24 07:17 pm (UTC)(link)
[ The Light.

Is it reassuring that Ego can't reach his goals yet? Yes, if only because it means that... maybe they have time. She doesn't have to leap to the final solution and simply put Peter down to save the rest of the universe (but— she would, if she had to, this time; she wouldn't risk forcing him to suffer as he had before).

She starts with that sharp noise of pain, the way he grabs at her, and Gamora holds him closer, keeps him supported in her strong arms. ]


I'm right here. I've got you. I'm here.

[ She's not letting him go. She's not going to cast him out into the black to be swallowed by his father's sea. Not when he's within reach, when this is him, and it feels like she's been just as lost, but staring Ego down now, playing the same game over again. ]

You are not doing this alone.
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[personal profile] godslay 2019-04-24 08:01 pm (UTC)(link)
[ As Peter sinks into her, Gamora's arms wrap around him completely, drawing him even closer, tighter, like that is going to keep him safe and present.

She knows as well as Peter that it won't.

She presses her nose into his hair, her hand cupping the nape of his neck as she breathes him in, really soaks up the feel of him – because this is actually Peter, this is the man she loves, not a monster wearing his face. She nods against him, reassured by the information and wary. But with this new confirmation, it tells her a lot about how to make her moves; things she'd been trying to understand and make sense of are suddenly clear. Unfortunately, knowing what's going on still hasn't given her an answer for how to stop it.

She drops kisses in sweaty curls, nuzzling at his temple. ]


I will. And whatever I have to do, whatever I can – I swear to you, he won't take you again.

[ She won't let Peter live trapped and imprisoned under his father's will. She can't do that to him. ]
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[personal profile] godslay 2019-04-24 08:27 pm (UTC)(link)
[ She listens intently, committing it all to memory and already turning it over and over again as she tries to decide how she's going to use this knowledge, and how she can.

Paranoid that we'll turn on him.

That doesn't surprise her, but she knows that means she'll have to do what she's able to allay his suspicions further – and be more mindful of him around the others, the more vulnerable of the group.

Don't let him. ]


No matter what.

[ She repeats it back to him, cupping his face to turn his eyes up, to make him look at her. ]

No matter what.

[ Before that can happen, before he can put star systems between them and take Peter farther out of reach.

She won't let him. She won't risk the team or Peter like that.

(But not yet. She still has to try.) ]


I promise.

[ She draws him up, presses her lips to his, and it's the first genuine kiss in too long. Real and heartfelt, rather than rote and calculated. ]
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[personal profile] godslay 2019-04-24 09:19 pm (UTC)(link)
[ She exhales against his cheek, nodding just slightly enough that she doesn't have to pull away. ]

I know. I know.

[ Her thumbs smooth over bristled cheeks, palms cradling his jaw as she kisses him again and again.

And into the kiss, the barest space between them, ]


I love you, too.

[ And she says it to him, only him, because even while Ego is wearing Peter's face, she can't say it. She won't ever say those words insincerely. ]

More than anything.

[ It's so true that it aches. It's a sharp barb behind her ribs, something that catches and stays her hand – because if she didn't love him, if she didn't feel this way for him, if he wasn't her best friend and every other half of her own jagged edges, it would be so easy. Save the universe, save them all – kill Peter. It would be simple. It would be the right thing to do, and she would do it.

But damn it, sentimentality is a weakness she's never shaken. A softness and sense of mercy that kept drove Gamora to share food with her starving sister, and left Peter alive in his father's hold. She could have killed him months before, so long ago, and maybe she should have (no, she absolutely should have), but she didn't.

She couldn't.

But this time, if all else fails...

She won't hesitate. ]
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[personal profile] godslay 2019-04-24 10:00 pm (UTC)(link)
Shh, don't.

[ She shushes him gently, quietly, because she knows he's sorry; she knows none of this is intentional or his fault or something he can control. She knows he's fighting. She knows he's doing everything that he can.

Right now, it's just not enough.

Her chest tightens as Peter's breathing hitches, and for a moment, it's so hard to breathe, because she doesn't want to say goodbye. She doesn't want to let him go. She squeezes her eyes tightly shut, her own inhale hitching as she crushes him to her, holds him so close— ]


I love you.

[ Again, murmured and hurried. ]

You won't do this alone.

[ And as much as she wants to cling to him and keep him grounded with her in that moment, she knows it won't save him. Instead of clutching him tight, she starts to ease him back down to the pillows, resettling with him. She can't let it look suspicious when Ego regains control, and if it seemed like she'd been having an entire moment without Ego's knowledge, that could put them all in danger. ]

I'm right here.

[ She strokes back his hair, pressing her lips in a tight line as she takes a deep breath, forces herself to let it go slowly, incrementally. She closes her eyes, loosens her grip, so it's like she's only been holding him unconsciously, urged closer in her sleep – the way she used to, before all of this. ]
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[personal profile] godslay 2019-04-24 10:55 pm (UTC)(link)
[ Gamora feels the shift when it happens, but she doesn’t let her eyes open, doesn’t stir. Her breathing stays slow and steady, until Peter (Ego) starts to stir beside her, and she reflexively curls her fingers against his chest. Her nose wrinkles, eyes squeezing shut and then slowly opening, like she’s shaking off the grogginess of a deep sleep. ]

Peter?

[ To her credit, Gamora affects the rough quality of a dry throat, voice thick with half-awareness. ]

What?
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[personal profile] godslay 2019-04-25 12:08 am (UTC)(link)
[ In the back of her mind, she distantly thinks of how long she’s spent listening to Peter speak – and how little Ego must have cared to do the same.

She turns her face to nuzzle faintly into his wrist. ]


Are you sure?

[ She drops a kiss on the heel of his hand, dark, hazy eyes watching him in the low light. ]
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[personal profile] godslay 2019-04-25 03:54 am (UTC)(link)
[ It's strange, how distinctly she notices the way Ego avoids her scars – imperfections, measurements of mortality and weakness – while Peter had always been reverent with them. She didn't understand (still doesn't, really) why he'd trace them so diligently, but somehow, Peter had loved those marked parts of her as much as he did the stretches of unblemished skin.

But she can feel Ego's thumb skirt under the gouges in her face, the stark silver under green.

Sweetheart.

Her stomach turns, but her soft and perfectly drowsy smile stays in place. She nods sleepily, reaching up to hold Ego's palm to her cheek. ]


You should get back to sleep, too. You need it.