riverview: ic contact;

[nostalgiabomb]

You've reached the voicemail of Star-Lord. Hit me with your best shot. Or— crap, wait, I should've quoted "Call Me" instead. Aw, dammit. Is it too late to— [ BEEP ] [ text | video | voice | action ] gif credit

USERNAME star.lord RESIDENCE community housing: floor 13, room 4 OCCUPATION perimeter guard: surveyor / salvage & repair specialist

Comments

[madeupnames]

[He bites his lip, listening with his full interest.

That'd do it. He's honestly not sure how he'd react if someone tormented Ned in front of him, but it — it wouldn't be pretty. He knows things like that would leave little room for anything but outrage and a desire to really just — hurt someone. Bad. He nods.]

... Right. I'll go back and check with Karen, see if she can pull up a list of all the people officially taken in by law enforcement. There should be recorded rosters of whoever was involved in the whole mess by now...

[Has he ever introduced you to Karen? No? He really should, because she's a great robot mom thing.]

[nostalgiabomb]

Is Karen some kinda contact you have with the cops?

[ that seems like the most logical conclusion ]

[madeupnames]

Oh, no. She's the AI system who lives in my Spider-Man mask!

[WAGS HAND NONCHALANTLY.]

She's super nice. You'd like her.

[nostalgiabomb]

[ A beat. Then, ]

She’s a what who does what.

[madeupnames]

She's an AI. You know, artificial intelligence... all of that cool robo-stuff...

Like... [what's something ancient he could relate to] KITT, from Knight Rider? She kinda helps me out when I'm out on the job. You'd have to actually put on the mask to even hear her, though.

[nostalgiabomb]

[ Peter waves a hand dismissively. ]

Dude. I know what an AI is. I lived in space.

I’m just wondering why you need one.

[madeupnames]

[WELL GOSH IT'S NOT LIKE U WERE CLEAR BIG P E T E.]

It was something Mr. Stark put into the suit, and it's kinda like... having a hands-free option when you're trying to get stuff done and crawl around on walls or swing through skyscrapers.

... At first it was really weird, but... now the nicest thing is having someone to talk to when everyone else is probably sleeping. It gets kinda' lonely on the night shift.

[Clearly the real reason Tony put an AI in the suit.]

[nostalgiabomb]

[ He casts the kid a thoughtful sort of look, lower jaw shifting a little to one side. Then, ]

You know, if you get tired of talking to Mother— [ And who let Peter watch Alien? It is a mystery (actually, no it isn’t; it was probably his grandpa, a lover of horror movies), but rest assured that Peter was way too young to see that movie. ] —you can always give me a ring.

[madeupnames]

[Oh, that's...! Really nice, actually. He looks humbled.

But then he decides to be a goof, so he doesn't get sappy.]

I dunno, that sounds like a terrible time for you. Patrolling is where I get all my weird shower thoughts. Like when I realized Centaurs have two rib cages. Or how cell phones are this generation's pocket watches. And what exactly is a snail's goal in life? Where's it going?

[nostalgiabomb]

Or why Goofy gets to wear clothes and have a house while Pluto is Mickey's pet?

[ listen, kid, Peter has 100% been there. ]

Yeah, I get it.

[madeupnames]

[........... His eyes go all round at this new revelation.]

Dude.

[That translates to: holy shit you're right, what the fuck is up with that???]

[nostalgiabomb]

[ That coaxes a quick huff of a laugh from Peter, and he nods a little. Right?!?!? ]

It's totally messed up, isn't it?

[madeupnames]

I'm really worried about Pluto now.

What if he's like Goofy, but they make him act like that? Oh my god, that's so creepy.

Someone should call the authorities.

[nostalgiabomb]

[ There's a beat of silence. Then, with a flat, shellshocked delivery, ]

What the hell, I never even thought of that.

[ what a dark and horrifying place your head is, little pete ]